Posts Tagged ‘Relationship Problem Advice’

Relationship Issues - Should You Yield?

Most often, when we get into a fight of ego with our romantic partner during relationship troubles and we are reluctant to give in, it can be very difficult for both parties to solve the issues.  During these times, it’s almost certain both sides believe they are right, and try hard to let the other side admit to his/her own faults.

All kinds of relationship problems can occur as a result of the harm done by constant battle of ego between the partners.  You must then ask yourself to what degree you are willing to compromise your own values in order to preserve your relationship.  In order to keep your lover when you know he/she won’t give in, are you still willing to give up your values?

You should know from your experience that it can be quite difficult to be true to our own integrity while making our relationship work when your partner just wouldn’t yield.  To what degree can you strike a balance between your own integrity and saving your relationship, yet feel you’re not losing yourself in the process?

Check out this truly great guide to rescue your relationship while maintaining your own integrity: Problems In Relationships - Giving In?

When we think about the question of whether we should give in, we can find a paradox if we really look into the question.  What are we really preserving when we have to excessively bend our values to preserve the relationship?  The truth is, a loving relationhship really should not require us to do that.  A truly loving relationship is a relationship in which each person accepts and even values the differences between them. 

We learn and grow from the problems in relationships.  As a result, instead of looking at the issue from the perspective of compromising our own integrity in order to preserve the relationship, why don’t we attempt a paradigm shift and see the whole issue as a great opportunity for both lovers to learn from their differences and achieve tremendous understanding and growth in our relationship?

Many partners in romantic relationships become much better persons and lovers when they learn and grow from their differences in relationship.  When one or both partners are reluctant to see the differences as opportunities for growth, then they will have problems.

If one of the partners becomes annoyed when the other partner does not accept his/her differences, and is reluctant to work with the partner to solve the problem, then it can be difficult for both of them to learn from their differences.  The issue can turn into an unhealthy one when the issue drags on without any improvement and the other partner is then directly or indirectly forced to yield or decide if he/she wants to stay in the relationship.

To get great tips on welcoming relationship challenges, and other secrets to repair relationship, be sure to check out: Problems In Relationship - Welcome The Challenges.

The outcome of conflicts in romantic relationship will depend on the intent of the partners during their struggle to handle their differences.  Generally, whether to protect ourselves from the pain of relationship or to learn about love are what romantic partners need to decide upon during conflicts in relationships.

Many ingenious ways can be carried out to control the relationship so that one does not have to face the real issues of the relationship if the intent is to protect oneself against the pain of relationship problems.  They may act defensive, argue, blame, withdraw, resist, explain, give in, etc.  When the partners dance around the real issues in their relationship in order to avoid the pain of facing the problems, they really lose the opportunity to learn and grow from their issues.

Actions like these almost always result in lack of fulfillment in the relationship and distance between the couple.  It is important to realize that the real problem is the unwillingness of the partners to learn and grow from their differences, and the real problem is NOT the differences.  Real spiritual growth and personal development occur when both partners are willing to learn from their differences and problems.

As we know, we have the power to control only ourselves, and we don’t have that control over others.  It is actually very difficult to rely on our partner to change his/her attitude so that we can have a good relationship.  We should do it first.  If you are in relationships where your partner refuses to learn and grow from the problems in relationships, then you need to be honest with yourself regarding how much of yourself you can give up and still maintain a sense of integrity.  You can bend and accommodate as long as you do not feel as if you are losing yourself or compromising your personal integrity.

This is important because you are really not preserving your relationship by accomodating, because eventually you are indirectly destroying the true essence of your relationship while losing yourself.  In the long run, the relationship will be destroyed if we give up our own integrity to save the relationship, because subconsciously we regret our own actions.  This doesn’t mean that you must be stubborn and tell your partner that it’s either your way or the highway, instead you and your partner must find a way to express your feelings in a sincere and healthy manner with the goal of reaching mutual understanding with each other.

I hope this article is helpful to you. Here is a website that contains my review of the best relationship problem advice programs that I have come across: The Best Guides To Repair Relationship.

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