How To Win Him Back

Posts Tagged ‘couples counselor’

One of the best things we get to experience in our lives is relationships.  From experiencing family relationships to love relationships it is wonderful.But in a few instances what was once good can turn bad.What was once considered something of great joy and happiness is now a source of pain and heartache.

I have seen this first hand helping people in couples counseling San Diego. What was once a promising relationship becomes antagonistic.What once looked so beautiful and promising now has a very grim outlook.What occurred and what is there that can be done to fix it?

That is a major question and one that is going to be hard to address.  Every relationship struggle is different.  But my experience as a marriage counselor San Diego has shown me there are methods you can use to bring out good solutions.

One of the things that is helpful to them is by giving them a safe place to talk.In general when you try and fix the fighting in your own home for some reason it doesn’t work.  By giving them a place where they can feel safe allows the opportunity to work things out.

One more thing that will help the couple is by being another ear to listen to them.But not just any old ear but an ear that will listen and be impartial.An ear that is able to hear the issues and talk about them impartially.  Doing that can work wonders.  That third person can address the issues apart from a heated argument.When a couple is in the heat of the argument and they try to fix it, it usually won’t work.

Another thing that the couple can be helped with is by teaching them how to listen to each other.  In my practice doing marriage counseling San Diego, I help them develop these skills.These skills are beneficial in helping them listen to one another rather than always attempting to be the winner in an argument.

By doing this, they are able to really address the issues. Accomplishing these few tasks can work wonders in a troubled relationship.I have seen it in action countless times as a marriage counselor.

Technorati Tags: couples counselor, couples therapy, family counselor, family therapist, marriage counselor, marriage therapy, therapist

When we think of going to the doctor, we often imagine steely tools, long waiting rooms and rubber gloves. However, Dr. James Cordova, Ph.D. (from Clark University in Worcester Massachusetts) envisions an annual marriage checkup to keep relationships healthy and strong. “Marital satisfaction improves for couples who have been through the Marriage Checkup and for “control couples” who aren’t improving,” he reported after running a six-month study of 136 couples visiting a couples counselor trained in mid-level interventions.

Most of the people in Cordova’s couples counselor study were around 47 years old for husbands and 44 years old for wives, married for an average of fifteen years, although there are some newlyweds and some seniors also involved. Typically, they’ll videotape a couple discussing a problem and the counselors will review it later. “We watch them talk about a problem in their relationship together,” Cordova explains. Two weeks later, he can point out strengths and weaknesses in the tape, then presenting a “menu of options” for dealing with the situations. Sometimes couples may need to see licensed professional counselors, read books or simply spend more time together. Six months later, the couple will respond via a questionnaire to report their progress.

The initial results of these annual counseling sessions for couples have been promising, Cordova reports. In the first 68 couples, most reported increased marital satisfaction, improvements in intimacy and a higher level of cooperation and acceptance in their households. “People that have been through the marriage checkup are improving in all kinds of ways in comparison to couples who haven’t.” He admits that some couples will undoubtedly relapse, as anyone would in medical or emotional therapy, yet those with access to treatment always fare better.

In the future, Cordova and his team hope that an annual couples counselor package will be widely available across the country. Even though couples can find a family marriage counselor as it is, he hopes that his method and the affordability can be marketed nationwide. After all, this brief intervention yields significant improvements that can help families stay together to raise their children, without sacrificing personal happiness.

Technorati Tags: couples counselor, licensed professional counselors, the counselors