Posts Tagged ‘counseling for marriage’

Dealing With Divorces Through Counseling

marriage therapy

In Judith Wallerstein’s book “The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce” (2000), she followed 100 children of divorces from childhood to adulthood. She found that, years later, the pain of their parents’ divorce still affected their relationships, work and parenting. She found that people whose parents divorced are more likely to be become delinquent, be sexually active, suffer alcoholism or get divorced themselves. However, the real impact of a divorce reaches a crescendo when the kids are in their 20s and 30s and feel despondent, as though they could never expect a relationship to succeed. Before the kids are affected, the help of marriage counselors should be sought out.

Divorces are frequently caused by financial hardship. Therefore, the counselors who could help most are often skilled in financial planning. “I’ve never seen a case in my 18 years of doing this where there hasn’t been a reason to have hope,” said Karin Maloney Stifler, a certified financial planner from Hudson, OH. She said she sees a lot of couples who are affluent but failed to save up a sufficient enough nest eggs to keep them afloat during tough economic times. Karyn Pistone, a financial planner from Beachstone, says she counsels a lot of people who are big spenders, often reaching beyond their means with credit and winding up in massive debt. The advisors say the best marriage therapy is in forming common goals and a united plan for spending and saving.

Another option is to attend divorce counseling with mental health counselors, rather than attorneys. “Divorce counseling” is sort of a misleading term because it’s intended to smooth the divorce process, rather than prevent it. If you’ve tried seeing licensed counselors and realize that there’s no other alternative, then divorce counseling can help avoid an expensive and hotly contested court battle. Often divorced couples feel deep resentment over property or the kids, which can be avoided by seeking divorce assistance. With therapeutic help, couples can gain a sense of closure and prepare for their separate futures. They’ll gain help deciding upon property division, child custody/visitation, child rearing and coming to a fair agreement.

Abandonment, abuse and adultery are certainly grounds for divorces. Finances, intimacy and boredom are things that could be fixed through counseling for couples. Even though relationships are viewed as personal affairs, it can help to have an impartial party helping to uncover and resolve your conflicts. There are certain strategies for problem solving, expressing discontent and promoting a healthy relationship that trained, licensed counselors can offer.

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Catholic Marriage Counseling Can Help Improve Your Relationships

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You can benefit from Catholic marriage counseling, whether you’re Catholic or not. Christian counselors are not aiming to convert the non-believers, but rather, they’re trying to defend the sanctity of marriage and strengthen the family environment. After all, strong, loving family units are mankind’s best defense against evil. Rather than pay $100-$200 per session with a licensed marriage therapy professional, why not see what God can do first?

One form of Catholic counseling happens before you even get married. Pre-marriage counseling is generally part of any Christian ceremony. Counseling for couples may be done in sessions, as a weekend retreat or as a group seminar. As with any other marital counseling, you’ll learn about conflict management, identifying wants or needs and strengthening communication skills. Often this opportunity is partially covered by insurance, with a small fee based on an income-sensitive sliding scale. The idea is that pitfalls can be prevented with a little bit of skill building and knowledge prior to tying the knot.

Another type of Catholic marriage counseling is for crisis intervention. Sometimes God’s sheep lose their way and succumb to anger or violence. The Catholic Church can help couples learn to forgive, reform and reconcile. In some cases, the damage or the destructiveness may require another intervention from licensed professional counselors, but the local pastors and priests have community resources at their disposal to deal with whatever discord comes their way.

Catholic marriage counseling is ideal for couples with strong faith who feel as though they’re falling off the path. Perhaps they’re feeling bored, having adulterous thoughts or are stressing about communication in the household. The basic premise is that one’s faith in God will provide all the strength one needs to sort through the tribulations of married life. Even though matches are said to be “made in Heaven,” we can often use a helping hand to remind us of our earthly purpose. Whether you choose a personal couples session, a group seminar or a romantic weekend retreat, Christian marriage counseling is a great start.

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